I'm writing this from the perspective of someone who believes in second chances and in redo's. I'm writing this from the perspective of someone who believes in starting over. I've always been someone who could stand the potential heartbreak that comes with taking a big risk, because in my option the reward was always worth it. I am the woman you will fail multiple times, but for some reason, with me you can always be assured to find refuge. With me, there will always be second, third, fourth, and even fifth chances.
I am the woman who will over explain your short-comings and make excuses for your abruptness. I am the woman who will be quick to fall for someone because I have hope in everyone. I am the too trusting little girl whose parents fear that she will get taken away by strangers. I am the woman who falls hard for someone, because the prospect of new love is so alluring, every time. I love being in love.
This blog is a warning to myself and for the women like me. This blog is for the women who leap straight into the mouth of the dragon, because we are forever amazed by how dragons blow fire. It's funny because we are the ever-so inquisitive women who love ask question after question, but never think to ask these fire blowing men how they're able to do it. Human shaped dragons blowing fire everywhere they go. I suppose smoke makes you carefree. So, instead of worrying about the repercussions of playing with fire breathing dragons, we just inhale deeply.
Now, when you encounter a human shaped dragon, you will be confused because he appears to be 100% human. Trust, he is half dragon. He is dangerous. Run, sis.
At first you'll be impressed by the way he can switch between two very distinct personalities. You'll wonder why he blows fire so smooth. He will confuse you. I repeat, run. He will paint you pictures of grandeur and excellence. He will pretend to ride with you, but he really just rides for himself. You see, dragons, are a weird breed. Their species is endangered, because day after day the women who once were ignorant to their tricks, are becoming skilled in their very own game. As a result, these dragons are wired for self-defense. They are wired to ensure that they are protected, at all costs and by all means.
Don't be hard on yourself for falling in love with this dragon. Dragons surround you, princess. While you are up in your ivory tower waiting for Prince Charming, dragons surround you. They have surrounded you for so long now that you able to tell them apart with ease. And for that reason, they must change shape. They must configure their appearance to try and trick you and steal your heart. You thought this dragon was your prince because he presented himself as such. So, it was only when you had fallen in love with him, did he decide to blow fire, showing you his true colors.
I'm not quite sure as to what this blog post is. It may be a rant or it may be a self-help post. Either way, I hope that it provides perspective for whoever needs this. We have completed one-quarter of 2018 and as I think about the progress that I've made on my New Year's resolutions, I am somewhat satisfied. I promised myself to be less accommodating with my romantic interests this year - I need to be more selfish with my time, with my energy, and with my money. In many ways, I have done so. Still, every now and again, I find myself in situations where I have relinquished all of the progress that I've made, only to succumb to my old ways. I am sensitive, in every sense of the word. I am also fierce, in every sense of the word. Still, I have yet to compromise between the two and that's something that I am learning how to do. I am both the susceptible woman, and the fire-breathing dragon and neither is truly a good position to be in.
I dedicate this blog to those aiming to find their balance in 2018. You can do it.
*Disclaimer: God's good grace brought this blog to life
**Disclaimer: This isn't about you. Get over yourself.